Easy Way Of Improving Strength And Fitness

Using free weights is effective way of improving strength and fitness. Lifting weights improves fitness while it burns calories, increase muscle size, strength, power, and endurance, and increases bone density. It also increases bone density and improves quality of life for many older adults. Instruction is necessary if you have never used free weights before, or are not that familiar with the use of free weights. Technique, and safety are important considerations.

Unlike weight machines, free weights don’t restrict movement. This is great for building strength, but it also increases the risk of injury. Safety precautions include having a good grip, maintain a stable position sitting or standing, use good technique or form, and getting good instruction from an exercise professional. Most accidents occur by falling weights that are not secure or fall out of a person’s hand, so pay particular attention to picking up and replacing free weights.

Buying Free Weights

Durability – Consider your exercise motivation for the quality and durability of the weights you are purchasing. If you plan to use the weights a lot, buy a high quality and durable product. Generally speaking, free weights are rather durable.

Assembly – Consider the time and convenience of buying weights that are set at a specific weight, or to purchase weights that can be changed according to your strength. For a set weight of dumbbells, no assembly is required.

Storage – Ensure you have adequate space to safely store the weights, depending on how many or how much weight you are going to purchase. Free weights can be stored on the floor, or on specialized racks.

Maintenance – Consider the maintenance requirements. Chrome weights require higher maintenance than metal, concrete, or foam-covered weights.

Using Free Weights

Free weights can develop muscle-fitness depending on how you use them.

Muscle Strength: 5-8 reps, 1-3 sets.

Muscle Endurance: 15-20 reps, 1-3 sets.

Muscle Power: 3-5 reps, 1-3 sets.

Rep is short for repetition. This means how many times you lift the weight. Set means a group of repetitions. Rest approximately one to two minutes between sets of each exercise, or long enough to catch your breath.

Muscle Groups to Train

Exercising the major muscle groups is important for developing fitness.

Upper body: front and back of arms, shoulders, chest, and upper back.

Torso: abdominals, sides of torso (obliques), and lower back.

Legs: front and back of thighs, calfs, and buttocks.

Exercises to Do

Upper body: Bicep curls, tricep extension, shoulder press, bench press, and bent-over row.

Torso: Abdominal curls (hands across chest), “Bird-Dog” (on hands and knees, lift opposite arm and leg 5 – 10 reps, then opposite arm/leg), and side-plank.

Legs: Squats or Lunges, and heel raises.

Technique is important!

Learn the proper technique for each exercise before proceeding.

Exercise both sides of the body. Whatever you exercise on the front of the body, proceed with the corresponding exercise for the back of the body.

Breathe! Exhale when the exercise is the hardest, and inhale when the exercise is the easiest.

Move your joints through a full range of motion when performing each exercise.

Move in a controlled manner. Do not let momentum move the weight.

Posture

Maintain a straight spine when performing all exercises.

Do not hyper-extend your spine.

When picking weights up from the floor (or putting them down), use your legs, not your back.

Using a spotter

When lifting very heavy weights, you should use a spotter in case the weights become too much for you to handle. A spotter can offer feedback about your technique, and give you a margin of safety to avoid injury.

Important Points to Remember

Before you buy: Consider the space you have in which to safely engage in a weight training program.

When you buy: Consider your exercise motivation in terms of the cost of the weights. Also consider the size of the handles as they fit in your hand.

Excellent for fitness: Using free weights is an excellent way to improve your fitness. You can increase the rate at which you burn calories, increase your muscle strength and size, and increase the strength of your bones. Increased strength through weight training can also improve the quality of life for older adults.

Your abilities: Consider your level of fitness before you purchase your weights. Be careful not to buy weights that are too heavy (or too light).

Make it a habit: Since you are considering buying exercise equipment, structure your lifestyle to make time to exercise and it will eventually become a life-long habit.

You Might As Well Do What You Love

When Wall Street crashed and jobs once considered most secure were lost, many gave up on business and law and decided to do what they love. It's the age-old choice between humanities and the sciences. Patricia Cohen wrote about the choice for The New York Times:
"Terry Shtob, the director of liberal arts at N.Y.U.'s continuing education school, said enrollment in arts and humanities programs for this fall grew 5 percent from last fall.
Many of those enrolled turned out to be laid-off Wall Street workers who were eligible for emergency retraining grants from the government. Ms. Shtob said her impression, after speaking to a few students, was that they had originally chosen careers in fields like business and law primarily because they felt those were financially secure. When that turned out not to be case, she said, they decided, 'I might as well do what I love.'"
It reminds me of Marsha Sinetar's book, "Do What You Love, the Money Will Follow."
Which did you choose? Sciences or arts? Which would you choose today?

You Might As Well Do What You Love

When Wall Street crashed and jobs once considered most secure were lost, many gave up on business and law and decided to do what they love. It's the age-old choice between humanities and the sciences. Patricia Cohen wrote about the choice for The New York Times:
"Terry Shtob, the director of liberal arts at N.Y.U.'s continuing education school, said enrollment in arts and humanities programs for this fall grew 5 percent from last fall.
Many of those enrolled turned out to be laid-off Wall Street workers who were eligible for emergency retraining grants from the government. Ms. Shtob said her impression, after speaking to a few students, was that they had originally chosen careers in fields like business and law primarily because they felt those were financially secure. When that turned out not to be case, she said, they decided, 'I might as well do what I love.'"
It reminds me of Marsha Sinetar's book, "Do What You Love, the Money Will Follow."
Which did you choose? Sciences or arts? Which would you choose today?

Date Movies That Leads to Raising a Women

Seduction, betrayal and more seduction are the stars in this period piece starring Glenn Close, John Malkovich and Michelle Pfeiffer. The Marquise de Merteuil (Close) asks her partner in deceit Vicomte de Valmont (Malkovich) to seduce a young woman to get back at a former lover.

However, Valmont has his wants and desires set on the sweet and tender Madame de Tourvel (Pfeiffer). Dangerous Liaisons has a heat and passion that simmers just underneath powdered wigs, accents and corsets. The innocent are taught to seduce, the guilty to lie and lives hang in the balance of a duel. Dangerous Liaisons is a classic and was reimagined as Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Cruel Intentions (also sexy and featuring one of our favorite chick kissing scenes).

Date Movies That Leads to Raising a Women

Seduction, betrayal and more seduction are the stars in this period piece starring Glenn Close, John Malkovich and Michelle Pfeiffer. The Marquise de Merteuil (Close) asks her partner in deceit Vicomte de Valmont (Malkovich) to seduce a young woman to get back at a former lover.

However, Valmont has his wants and desires set on the sweet and tender Madame de Tourvel (Pfeiffer). Dangerous Liaisons has a heat and passion that simmers just underneath powdered wigs, accents and corsets. The innocent are taught to seduce, the guilty to lie and lives hang in the balance of a duel. Dangerous Liaisons is a classic and was reimagined as Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Cruel Intentions (also sexy and featuring one of our favorite chick kissing scenes).

Older Women are Independent Reality

One of the top 10 things we love about older women is their independence. Older women are typically more comfortable being alone. They’ve spent time in and out of relationships and consequently they know how to get along fine without us by their sides every single moment. They know that they don’t need a boyfriend attached to their hip to be happy. This means that older women are less likely to be clingy or needy, which makes them much easier to get along with.

Older Women are Independent Reality

One of the top 10 things we love about older women is their independence. Older women are typically more comfortable being alone. They’ve spent time in and out of relationships and consequently they know how to get along fine without us by their sides every single moment. They know that they don’t need a boyfriend attached to their hip to be happy. This means that older women are less likely to be clingy or needy, which makes them much easier to get along with.

"Happy Birth day My Son" a Mom's Story

I started planning for my daughter’s first birthday party when she was about six months old. I started with Internet searches for girlie themes and ideas and then poured over craft books and magazines for more inspiration. At the time, I was feeling pretty ambitious and even thought about what sort of cake I would bake and how it would be decorated. I consulted friends to see what types of parties they had for their kids or what kind of parties they were planning to have.

What I found was a wide range of ideas of what a first birthday party should be. I had one friend who wanted it to be family only, at home, with a simple cake and just a few presents. Then I met a woman at a Kroger who told me she had a carnival themed party for her one-year-old, complete with pony rides, a popcorn machine, and clowns. The carnival idea was cute, but way out of our budget. Not to mention that my daughter and her friends were at an age where clowns would’ve terrified and popcorn would’ve choked them.

So I decided I would try to fall somewhere in the middle. I would invite her playgroup friends, but ask them not to bring gifts. I would rent a bubble machine (toddlers are fascinated with bubbles!!) on the cheap from a local DJ, but skip renting any “live” form of entertainment. I still planned to make the cake myself not only to save money, but to make it special for her special day.

I needed a theme. With my daughter’s strawberry blonde hair and my love of all things retro, it was decided that a Strawberry Shortcake theme complete with red and pink everything would be prefect. The idea for her cake was coming together, too. I would just make a round, layered out-of-the-box pink cake with pink canned icing; strawberry flavored. To incorporate the color red I would use red fruit leather and cut out circles for polka dots. I was pleased with my creativity and began scouring local party stores for supplies.

I went to one place where I did a mental tally of just the basics I would need and it added up to nearly $75 dollars. Yikes, I would certainly have to scale back my plans a little so we would be able to afford to buy her a present, too. I have a good friend with a coveted membership to The Flower Factory and she assured me I would find the supplies much cheaper there. The Flower Factory is a wholesale warehouse in Centerville open only to business owners but recently they’ve begun allowing members to bring in up to two guests. Having never been there I’m sure my idea of what was there was a bit lofty. To me it seemed like a mythical shopping Mecca where I would find anything and everything I ever wanted.

It wasn’t quite like that, though I did manage to get my supplies there for $25 dollars. Just four days shy of the party I still had not bought the ingredients for a cake. We had family coming in town for the celebration and I was busy with scrubbing down the bathroom and removing all the cat hair off our furniture before their arrival. So, I decided to give in and order one from a bakery.

Bakeries I’ve encountered tend to have trouble thinking outside the box, and as a result, I never should’ve mentioned my idea for a Strawberry Shortcake themed party. As soon as I did, the girl who was helping me got out a book and showed me picture after picture of different Strawberry Shortcake themed cakes. They seemed a little garish to me, but after a short time I was swayed and we picked the one that came topped with a plastic statue of a Strawberry Shortcake Doll. Defeated, I went home and called my mom.

She was shocked that I hadn’t figured out what my daughter was going to wear to her party. “She only has one first birthday, you have to dress her like a princess.” She said this to me over the phone as I rolled my eyes. My mother had raised four girls and not once do I remember her dressing any of us as princesses. But after the cake selection I had resigned to the fact that I could not control every detail of the party. It wasn’t her wedding, after all. So we headed to the mall where I found a “princess” dress complete with a pink tulle skirt and a birthday cake with the number 1 on it. Done.

"Happy Birth day My Son" a Mom's Story

I started planning for my daughter’s first birthday party when she was about six months old. I started with Internet searches for girlie themes and ideas and then poured over craft books and magazines for more inspiration. At the time, I was feeling pretty ambitious and even thought about what sort of cake I would bake and how it would be decorated. I consulted friends to see what types of parties they had for their kids or what kind of parties they were planning to have.

What I found was a wide range of ideas of what a first birthday party should be. I had one friend who wanted it to be family only, at home, with a simple cake and just a few presents. Then I met a woman at a Kroger who told me she had a carnival themed party for her one-year-old, complete with pony rides, a popcorn machine, and clowns. The carnival idea was cute, but way out of our budget. Not to mention that my daughter and her friends were at an age where clowns would’ve terrified and popcorn would’ve choked them.

So I decided I would try to fall somewhere in the middle. I would invite her playgroup friends, but ask them not to bring gifts. I would rent a bubble machine (toddlers are fascinated with bubbles!!) on the cheap from a local DJ, but skip renting any “live” form of entertainment. I still planned to make the cake myself not only to save money, but to make it special for her special day.

I needed a theme. With my daughter’s strawberry blonde hair and my love of all things retro, it was decided that a Strawberry Shortcake theme complete with red and pink everything would be prefect. The idea for her cake was coming together, too. I would just make a round, layered out-of-the-box pink cake with pink canned icing; strawberry flavored. To incorporate the color red I would use red fruit leather and cut out circles for polka dots. I was pleased with my creativity and began scouring local party stores for supplies.

I went to one place where I did a mental tally of just the basics I would need and it added up to nearly $75 dollars. Yikes, I would certainly have to scale back my plans a little so we would be able to afford to buy her a present, too. I have a good friend with a coveted membership to The Flower Factory and she assured me I would find the supplies much cheaper there. The Flower Factory is a wholesale warehouse in Centerville open only to business owners but recently they’ve begun allowing members to bring in up to two guests. Having never been there I’m sure my idea of what was there was a bit lofty. To me it seemed like a mythical shopping Mecca where I would find anything and everything I ever wanted.

It wasn’t quite like that, though I did manage to get my supplies there for $25 dollars. Just four days shy of the party I still had not bought the ingredients for a cake. We had family coming in town for the celebration and I was busy with scrubbing down the bathroom and removing all the cat hair off our furniture before their arrival. So, I decided to give in and order one from a bakery.

Bakeries I’ve encountered tend to have trouble thinking outside the box, and as a result, I never should’ve mentioned my idea for a Strawberry Shortcake themed party. As soon as I did, the girl who was helping me got out a book and showed me picture after picture of different Strawberry Shortcake themed cakes. They seemed a little garish to me, but after a short time I was swayed and we picked the one that came topped with a plastic statue of a Strawberry Shortcake Doll. Defeated, I went home and called my mom.

She was shocked that I hadn’t figured out what my daughter was going to wear to her party. “She only has one first birthday, you have to dress her like a princess.” She said this to me over the phone as I rolled my eyes. My mother had raised four girls and not once do I remember her dressing any of us as princesses. But after the cake selection I had resigned to the fact that I could not control every detail of the party. It wasn’t her wedding, after all. So we headed to the mall where I found a “princess” dress complete with a pink tulle skirt and a birthday cake with the number 1 on it. Done.

When your Beloved Love Someone Else!

READER'S QUESTION

Hey Doc,

I’m an engineer for an aerospace company. I met Monica at a software convention. Our first date was lunch; I kept things light and used some wacky humor. I waited 10 days before calling her again and kept the call to 10 minutes. She wanted to e-mail back and forth “to get to know each other better,” but I laughed that off and said “E-mail is for Star Trek dorks,” which she got a kick out of. I called again a week later and invited her on another date. The date went well: I acted like a gentleman, was well-dressed, and we got to know each other more. She took me golfing (I hate golf but played along), and I pretty much determined that Monica’s character and personality were top-notch and that she was a Flexible Giver.

IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE

Before I drove back home, she confessed that she hadn’t met anyone like me, but that she had a problem that I ought to know about. I sat and listened, but didn’t encourage any breakdowns. She said that she had dated a man, Tom, four years earlier and that she had fallen deeply in love with him, but he had chosen to marry another woman. Then she went on to confess that she didn’t think she could truly love someone else the same way as Tom ever again.

She said she thought that I was irresistibly attractive and “perfect,” but that Tom was somehow “imprinted” on her brain and that she didn’t know how to get rid of the memory, even after therapy. By the way, Monica is no nutcase. She graduated from a top college and comes from a good family.

PLAYING IT COOL

My response was to give her a hug, tell her it was OK and that we were just getting to know each other casually anyway, which was true. Over the next year, we spent more time developing a romantic relationship of sorts, though we never called it that. In fact, we never called it anything, and never talked about it. Maybe I handled this wrong, but there was a strong attraction between us, and I wanted to keep things casual and avoid the subject of Tom and see if she could get over him. Within eight months, her Interest Level seemed to skyrocket as we spent time together, particularly when she found out that I was dating other women (since we never had any commitment).

My problem now is that I want to marry this girl (although I’ve followed your advice and not blabbed anything about loving her desperately), and I also know that she wants to marry me. But I need to know her current feelings about Tom before plunging in. I fear that bringing him up again won’t lead anywhere good. At the same time, I can’t marry Monica without knowing I’m No. 1 in her life. To further complicate matters, what if someday Tom gets divorced and tries to get Monica back?

AM I IN TOO DEEP?

Tell me, where do I go from here? Did I handle this right, or should I have run in the other direction when the subject of Tom came up in the early stages? This girl’s a keeper, but not if she can’t forget the other guy.

DOC LOVE'S RESPONSE

Hi Delmar,

First of all, it’s great that you passed on Monica’s invitation to sit there e-mailing each other. Like my cousin Sal “The Fish” Love says: “Playing with a computer when it comes to women is a big waste of time.” Plus, it’s an anti-challenge. Unfortunately, that’s the only thing you did right.

Now let me just get this straight before we go any further. After two dates, you’re swooning over a woman’s character? Dude, you know nothing whatsoever about this woman after two dates. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says: “After spending about seven hours with a babe you have her all figured out? No way, Jose!”

SHE'S NOT AVAILABLE

But let’s move on. When Monica told you that she could never again love a man like she loved Tom, it meant she is not available. That’s what you’re telling me here, Delmar, and more importantly, that’s what Monica was telling you. Monica has the hots for a man who broke her heart. You know what “The System” says about that, right? No ex-boyfriends or ex-husbands lurking in the background. When Monica tells you that Tom is imprinted on her brain and that she can’t forget about him even after she lay on a shrink’s couch for years, that sure sounds like lurking to me. In fact, that’s more than lurking in the background -- Tom is right there in the room with you and Monica! It means that she’s going to be in love with Tom for the rest of her life and that you don’t stand a chance. But at least Monica was being honest. She was right up-front with you and told you that she’s really not on the market.

My friend, you don’t know anything about Monica’s family because you haven’t even met them. Again, you’re jumping to conclusions. And just because she got straight A's at Princeton doesn’t mean she can’t be a nutcase when it comes to romantic love. Remember that Joran van der Sloot went to college, came from a good family and that his father was a top judge in Aruba. What does that tell you?

When you say you were just getting to know each other casually, you’re rationalizing. A romantic relationship “of sorts” means that it’s not a romantic relationship at all. You might have thought there was a strong attraction between you and Monica, but there was a stronger attraction between her and Tom -- which means you’re No. 2, man. Why would you want to be No. 2 to anybody?

SHE'S NOT INTO YOU

Yet, in the face of all this stuff, you still want to marry this girl who’s carrying a torch for someone else. I can definitely tell you haven’t read my book, because if you had, you wouldn’t be making a blunder this huge! And I have news for you, Delmar: You are desperate -- because Monica digs somebody else. And if she wants to marry you, then she’s even nuttier than you are. That’s obvious because she’s in love with someone else and keeps going out with you.

If Tom ever got divorced, you’d better watch out, because Monica would dump you for him in a heartbeat. Tom is No. 1, not you, guy. Do you really want to always live in his shadow?

Where do you go from here? You have to get “The System,” memorize it and forget this girl. She’s a complete waste of time. No, you didn’t handle this thing right -- you handled it horribly. Of course you should have run in the other direction when she told you about Tom, but you didn’t. And like my cousin Rabbi Love says: “She’s not a keeper at all -- she’s already kept by another guy.”

Remember, guys: For a girl to fall in love with you, she has to be available.

To hear my LOVE RADIO SHOW, send me your love questions or to find out more about “The System,” visit me at www.doclove.com or call (800) 404-2644. For the past 30 years, Doc Love has asked thousands of women: “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”

When your Beloved Love Someone Else!

READER'S QUESTION

Hey Doc,

I’m an engineer for an aerospace company. I met Monica at a software convention. Our first date was lunch; I kept things light and used some wacky humor. I waited 10 days before calling her again and kept the call to 10 minutes. She wanted to e-mail back and forth “to get to know each other better,” but I laughed that off and said “E-mail is for Star Trek dorks,” which she got a kick out of. I called again a week later and invited her on another date. The date went well: I acted like a gentleman, was well-dressed, and we got to know each other more. She took me golfing (I hate golf but played along), and I pretty much determined that Monica’s character and personality were top-notch and that she was a Flexible Giver.

IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE

Before I drove back home, she confessed that she hadn’t met anyone like me, but that she had a problem that I ought to know about. I sat and listened, but didn’t encourage any breakdowns. She said that she had dated a man, Tom, four years earlier and that she had fallen deeply in love with him, but he had chosen to marry another woman. Then she went on to confess that she didn’t think she could truly love someone else the same way as Tom ever again.

She said she thought that I was irresistibly attractive and “perfect,” but that Tom was somehow “imprinted” on her brain and that she didn’t know how to get rid of the memory, even after therapy. By the way, Monica is no nutcase. She graduated from a top college and comes from a good family.

PLAYING IT COOL

My response was to give her a hug, tell her it was OK and that we were just getting to know each other casually anyway, which was true. Over the next year, we spent more time developing a romantic relationship of sorts, though we never called it that. In fact, we never called it anything, and never talked about it. Maybe I handled this wrong, but there was a strong attraction between us, and I wanted to keep things casual and avoid the subject of Tom and see if she could get over him. Within eight months, her Interest Level seemed to skyrocket as we spent time together, particularly when she found out that I was dating other women (since we never had any commitment).

My problem now is that I want to marry this girl (although I’ve followed your advice and not blabbed anything about loving her desperately), and I also know that she wants to marry me. But I need to know her current feelings about Tom before plunging in. I fear that bringing him up again won’t lead anywhere good. At the same time, I can’t marry Monica without knowing I’m No. 1 in her life. To further complicate matters, what if someday Tom gets divorced and tries to get Monica back?

AM I IN TOO DEEP?

Tell me, where do I go from here? Did I handle this right, or should I have run in the other direction when the subject of Tom came up in the early stages? This girl’s a keeper, but not if she can’t forget the other guy.

DOC LOVE'S RESPONSE

Hi Delmar,

First of all, it’s great that you passed on Monica’s invitation to sit there e-mailing each other. Like my cousin Sal “The Fish” Love says: “Playing with a computer when it comes to women is a big waste of time.” Plus, it’s an anti-challenge. Unfortunately, that’s the only thing you did right.

Now let me just get this straight before we go any further. After two dates, you’re swooning over a woman’s character? Dude, you know nothing whatsoever about this woman after two dates. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says: “After spending about seven hours with a babe you have her all figured out? No way, Jose!”

SHE'S NOT AVAILABLE

But let’s move on. When Monica told you that she could never again love a man like she loved Tom, it meant she is not available. That’s what you’re telling me here, Delmar, and more importantly, that’s what Monica was telling you. Monica has the hots for a man who broke her heart. You know what “The System” says about that, right? No ex-boyfriends or ex-husbands lurking in the background. When Monica tells you that Tom is imprinted on her brain and that she can’t forget about him even after she lay on a shrink’s couch for years, that sure sounds like lurking to me. In fact, that’s more than lurking in the background -- Tom is right there in the room with you and Monica! It means that she’s going to be in love with Tom for the rest of her life and that you don’t stand a chance. But at least Monica was being honest. She was right up-front with you and told you that she’s really not on the market.

My friend, you don’t know anything about Monica’s family because you haven’t even met them. Again, you’re jumping to conclusions. And just because she got straight A's at Princeton doesn’t mean she can’t be a nutcase when it comes to romantic love. Remember that Joran van der Sloot went to college, came from a good family and that his father was a top judge in Aruba. What does that tell you?

When you say you were just getting to know each other casually, you’re rationalizing. A romantic relationship “of sorts” means that it’s not a romantic relationship at all. You might have thought there was a strong attraction between you and Monica, but there was a stronger attraction between her and Tom -- which means you’re No. 2, man. Why would you want to be No. 2 to anybody?

SHE'S NOT INTO YOU

Yet, in the face of all this stuff, you still want to marry this girl who’s carrying a torch for someone else. I can definitely tell you haven’t read my book, because if you had, you wouldn’t be making a blunder this huge! And I have news for you, Delmar: You are desperate -- because Monica digs somebody else. And if she wants to marry you, then she’s even nuttier than you are. That’s obvious because she’s in love with someone else and keeps going out with you.

If Tom ever got divorced, you’d better watch out, because Monica would dump you for him in a heartbeat. Tom is No. 1, not you, guy. Do you really want to always live in his shadow?

Where do you go from here? You have to get “The System,” memorize it and forget this girl. She’s a complete waste of time. No, you didn’t handle this thing right -- you handled it horribly. Of course you should have run in the other direction when she told you about Tom, but you didn’t. And like my cousin Rabbi Love says: “She’s not a keeper at all -- she’s already kept by another guy.”

Remember, guys: For a girl to fall in love with you, she has to be available.

To hear my LOVE RADIO SHOW, send me your love questions or to find out more about “The System,” visit me at www.doclove.com or call (800) 404-2644. For the past 30 years, Doc Love has asked thousands of women: “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”